Booger Sugar, Bogus Investigations, Bassmasters and a Classic Blunder

The Secret Service closes the White House cocaine investigation, leaving the smell of fish behind.

I’m not buying the Secret Service’s dead-end investigation into the White House cocaine discovery, and apparently I’m not the only one.

“Without physical evidence, the investigation will not be able to single out a person of interest from the hundreds of individuals who passed through the vestibule where the cocaine was discovered,” so it’s now “closed due to lack of physical evidence.”

Seriously? We’re expected to believe that?

Not only is this the White House—arguably one of the most secure places on earth—but the way the story kept changing day to day? Yeah, no.

The whole thing is fishier than a Bassmaster weigh-in. (Trigger warning for Lefties: lots of Deplorables showing their patriotism, especially at the beginning of this clip.)

Several Republicans in Congress didn’t buy it either. Rep. Tim Burchett (R-TN) called it “bogus” and walked out of Thursday’s Congressional briefing. Rep. Nancy Mace (R-SC) noted that “This is one of the most secure locations in the world, some of the best law enforcement officers in the world — and they don’t have any answers.” Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO), who (bless her!) stayed for the entire briefing, said the roughly 1 gram of cocaine was found in one of 182 lockers with the key missing on July 2. Despite a brief flurry of excitement mis-week that the coke was found in the library, this audio clip (from 0:40-1:12) details “no match” in the library, but a positive test (“yellow bar”), with that location not being mentioned. So, really, who knows?

I suppose it’s possible that the dime bag was found during a routine sweep of the missing-key lockers. But, that begs several questions that I’m not sure were even asked, like:

• Was this a routine sweep of the lockers?

• Why was this locker opened, and at this particular time?

• Was anything else found in this locker? If yes, what? Was it analyzed? What did that analysis show?

• Was it part of a scheduled process?

• Were the lockers going to be re-keyed?

• Was that locker and the surrounding ones fingerprinted?

• If so, how many prints were recovered?

• How many prints were matched to those on file for White House employees?

• Were the print matches interviewed? Drug tested?

• What were the results? If they weren’t tested, why weren’t they?

• Since any identified fingerprints can be considered suspicious for cocaine use, how many of these people were the subject of no-knock home raids by the DEA? Were any innocents killed in these raids, as is sometimes the case?

• After the White House was evacuated, were the personnel asked to turn out their pockets and go through a metal detector upon their return?

• If so, did this recover any “missing” locker keys? Specifically, did it recover the missing key to the locker where the cocaine was found?

• If not, why not? Wouldn’t this be a possible way to find the owner of the drugs?

• Since all federal employees are subject to random drug tests, were these done on all of the returning personnel? If not, then why? Is this not “probable cause” for a test?

• What other areas of the White House were searched, and how was this done? Specifically, were drug dogs used in this search? If yes, we’re ant other drugs found? If no, then why not?

• Were all other White House personnel given a random drug test when they returned to work immediately after the Sunday when the baggie was found? If not, then why not?

Did anyone in Congress ask these questions? What were the answers? If they weren’t asked, then why not? I’m just curious, no other reason.

Now, imagine what would have happened at your workplace if a dime bag of cocaine had been found. Immediate, mandatory wizz quizzes with prompt termination and/or court-ordered struggle sessions substance abuse “treatment” would have been the bare minimum those who have impurified their precious bodily fluids would have “enjoyed.” How many hours of indoctrination “training” on the Evils of Drugs(tm) would you and your coworkers been forced to attend?

Somehow, I doubt these sessions would have included former Rep. Madison Cawthon’s comments about sex and drugs in DC (the comments that ensured his transition to EX-Congressman), or the CIA’s long history of involvement in the international drug trade.

In all honesty and fairness to the Secret Service, a general-use locker with a missing key could present a difficult case, but seriously? The Secret Service literally had all the resources in the world to call on to solve this, but in 11 days just threw up their hands, called it done, and shut it down forever.

As I said, fishy, to say the least.

Why, it’s almost as fishy as the complete, total and utter lack of any kind of decent investigation into the Epstein Island flight logs…or Hillary’s emails…or Georgia’s voting machines and the water leak that wasn’t…or…or….

Yeah. Insert Big Sigh here.

So, what we have is a week’s worth of all Booger Sugar, all the time until Monday, when the switch was flipped and suddenly…crickets. Then, yesterdays “nothing to see here, no evidence, move along, people; case closed” statement and Congressional briefing happened, and we’re all supposed to just shrug and return to our regular programming, already in progress.

That C-SPAN video showing Hunter tweakin’ & freakin’ on the White House balcony Sunday before the baggie was discovered? He was just hot.

Come on, man!

From ‘way out here in flyover country, it looks like the DC apparatus is once again covering up for the Big Guy, or somebody with some clout in his administration. I can’t help but wonder how many hours (or minutes) it would have taken to throw some poor intern or Secretary under the bus had it been their blow. I also can’t help but wonder just what percentage of the White House staff would fail a wizz quiz given next Monday morning, first thing? And while we’re at it, why not test Congress, too? You know, lead by example, and all that.

Yeah, like that’ll ever happen. Ain’t that right, Madison?

In absence of anything like a satisfactory conclusion to this madness, we’re only left with speculation. Was this merely a case of “Only Users Lose Drugs” that certainly did not involve a member of the Biden family with a long history of enjoying the nose candy? Was it a worker on the “construction” we were told was ongoing at the White House? Was it really found “near” the entrance where Vice Prezzie Kamalamadingdong parks? Or was it…ALIENS!?!

Barring a mysterious revelation at a future date, which I won’t discount at all, we may never know. What we do know for certain is that it was a tremendous distraction for the entire July 4th holiday and short work week. That begs the question: what were we NOT supposed to notice last week?

Was it that France was (and still is) burning, largely due to the same loony immigration policy the Biden Regime is adamantly insisting upon for us? Or what French influencer Papacito suggested that French patriots do about it—absolutely nothing, except to “Let the Republic go to the end of its logic.”

That RFK Jr. dropped a campaign commercial that knocked it out of the park?

That The Sound Of Freedom bounced Disney’s Indiana Jones flop out of first place in theaters on July 4th? Because we’re not supposed to notice just how involved the US Government is in child trafficking.

That despite Brandon’s “no boots on the ground” pledge in Ukraine, the CIA has boots on the ground.

That Ukraine is already violating a treaty it signed by using “butterfly” mines, and were about to send them cluster munitions? You know, the same cluster munitions we said last year Russia was committing war crimes for using? Yeah, those cluster munitions.

That Biden’s regulations are costing each American household $10,000 per year?

That Russia is jamming the ever-loving crap out of the US and NATO weapons Ukraine is using against them, which doesn’t bode well for our troops when Brandon drags us into WWIII.

Or was the most important thing we weren’t supposed to notice this past week is that President Donald J. Trump is now drawing bigger crowds than ELVIS!?!

Think about that, what it means, and how it must terrify the Oligarchs of the Regime.

Booger Sugar, indeed.

But, I’m sure Thursday’s “nothing to see here” report wasn’t at all meant to be a distraction from anything else serious, like Biden calling up the Reserves in preparation for involving us (directly) in a land war in Asia. Because as we all know, that would be falling for one of the classic blunders, and I’m sure the Big Guy wouldn’t do that!

Don’t you feel better now?

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